Couples Therapy

 

    Our family trees are replete with amazing and inspiring people. Some are sincere, creative, witty, and just plain fun to be around. Others are serious, courageous leaders that we look to in times of duress. They are all defined by these attributes and their personalities. Sometimes, however, we don’t view them as just a person but as a member of a couple, interwoven with their life partner creating an entity that characterizes both of them. My own tree has many of these “entities” and I would like to introduce you to some of them. 

Bailah and Moshe Pasternak

     My great grandparents on my mother’s side were Moshe and Bailah Pasternak. They were born in and lived in Dolishits, Poland. They had twelve children, the oldest being Rachel, my grandmother. Bailah died in 1939 in her home town. Three years later at the age of 82 Moshe was murdered by the Nazis in Treblinka. They must have instilled a strong sense of family in their children. The twelve siblings looked after each other and stayed in contact with each other. This important attribute was passed along to their descendants. This is in full evidence during our monthly Pasternak cousins’ Zoom sessions. Sometimes there are children and grandchildren of seven or more of the aforementioned brothers and sisters in attendance. 

Mary and Frank Levin

     Frank and Mary Levin impressed my father. Mary was his aunt (his father’s sister) and she and Frank built up a furniture business in Jeannette, PA. She and Frank helped out her brother Louis (my grandfather) by getting him started in the real estate business in Jeannette in the 1920’s. Frank died in 1952 but Mary kept the business going with the help of her son, Ben. I remember Tante Mary and always felt like she was the matriarch of the family.

     I wrote about Matt and May Arkin last year. They were another couple that advised several relatives about getting started in the auto parts business. My father being one of them. Their business acumen and work ethic was an inspiration for their future generations.

Helen and Murray Ringold

Sam and Nat Levine

Herman and Shirley Levine

Bernie and Lil Levine

     All of my aunts and uncles were referred to by both names. Aunt Helen and uncle Murray, Uncle Sam and aunt Nat, Uncle Bernie and aunt Lillie, uncle Herman and aunt Shirley, and aunt Rose and uncle Dave were all regarded as single units and were inseparable in my mind.

     It might have more to do with familiarity than anything else. The time spent with these relatives and the strong devotion to family that’s been exhibited by both sides of my family is a principal reason I view them as partners rather than individuals. I spent countless hours with my paternal grandparents so they were always referred to as “Bubbie and Zayde” but I didn’t know my mother’s mother very well and I never even met my maternal grandfather. She was always called “Boo” by me and my cousins on that side and he was only an afterthought. 

Becky and Matt Becker

     The future will bring more couples into my life story. Currently I have only one niece that is married. Becky and her Husband Matt have two fabulous young boys. Becky and Matt are impressive, exceptional parents and the development of their kids is testimony to their commitment as parents. 

Melody and Jason

    I am looking forward to May when another niece will be betrothed. Melody and Jason will be tying the knot and I am happy to welcome this guy into our family. The two of them are madly in love with each other and their dedication to each other is something all couples should strive for.

Molly and Bea

     My daughter, Molly and her partner Bea are a fun loving, life loving, compassionate, empathetic, and adventurous couple. Their energy will entice you to enjoy life as much as they do. 

Sid and Arlene

     I myself, am part of a couple. Arlene and I have been married for 43 years and I can’t imagine what life would be without her. We are the definition of a team and our teamwork has resulted in a wonderful family, a rewarding lifestyle, and the outlook of many more years together. I hope that future generations will consider us a couple to emulate for their own success.